It occurs to me that once a man has a vasectomy he can never (again) be guilty of onanism…

It occurs to me that once a man has a vasectomy he can never (again) be guilty of onanism…
Yup. No, you're not being too literal—my thought, after all, was purposely framed with the term "onanism" rather than "masturbation." And although the thought didn't bubble up as an actual, serious question, why the heck can't you treat it as if it were? Life's too short to worry about whether one is being all too serious or too totally frivolous. Be as best suits you at any given time, that's my motto.
As for an answer or rebuttal or somesuch to my thought … well … as the lovely and talented runeshower points out below, it depends on whether it's the spilling or the withholding that is of concern. No doubt The Church finds them equally repugnant, but I'm fortunately not under Its jurisdiction.
I guess you can't get any more "real" than that…
Thanks for awarding the Biblical Accuracy point. ;)